The Royal Military Academy's Impostor Owns a Dungeon [BL] novel Chapter 595

Chapter 595: Round Two: Forbidden Arts

And how hard did that come down.

Streamer Dylan was absolutely certain that somewhere across the Empire, someone had just attempted to lick their holographic screen.

Because he nearly did.

He would have done the very same thing if not for the fact that he was the one presenting all this. And, more importantly, because he was already compensated with the food itself.

And guess what? He would not even feel ashamed.

Also, why should he be ashamed when his dashboard and comment section were completely empty? Not because no one was watching, but because the entire Star Net was lagging under the strain.

The silence was eerie.

He prayed for the repose of the poor Star Net employees who had been warned at least an hour ahead of time, but the truth was that this quiet was bliss.

Until, of course, the comment section reloaded. And then exploded.

"..."

[H-HOW COULD THIS BE?! IS THAT OUR PRECIOUS TOMATO?!]

[NOOOOO! IT WAS SLICED IN HALF! AAAAAHHHH!]

[LOOK AT THE JUICE! THE SEEDS! THE GLISTEN!]

[WHAT ARE YOU ALL CRYING ABOUT, CAN YOU NOT SEE WHAT HAPPENED TO THE GREAT EGG?!]

[The egg is still the egg, but did you see the fries?! The sound of the crunch still echoes in my mind!]

[DYLAN! DYLAN! SAY SOMETHING!]

[WHERE? WHEN? WHY? HOW?!?!?!]

[HAHAHAHA! I KNEW IT! Vendor 11820251002 would never abandon us!]

Dylan stared at the chaos and finally spoke.

"Definitely no such thing."

"I’m not sure about anyone else," he continued carefully, "but as someone who has been involved in preparing these announcements, I can tell you how much effort went into every single one of these..."

The chat instantly turned into a violent waterfall of text. Dylan could not even read half of it. He only glimpsed fragments asking what happened, when it happened, why it happened, and how.

The live audience leaned closer, as if proximity to their screens would help. People who had never in their lives tuned into a live stream were suddenly watching like their lives depended on it.

And Dylan, for once, was their prophet.

"In fact," Dylan said, trying not to choke on the weight of a billion expectations, "our most precious fruit vendor—no, our savior—considered a few very important things. That is why it took so long."

The comment section lost all coherence.

"See, the tutorial videos have been prepared for future use," Dylan went on, sweat prickling down his back. "It was a concern that people might be flustered or unprepared when they first received the ingredients."

"Our vendor did not want such a thing. That is why the first products will be sold as finished dishes. But at the same time... it would be a shame for the people of the Empire to miss out on cooking these dishes themselves."

"..."

It was not just his audience that gasped. It was the entire Empire. A collective sound of disbelief and awe rippled through galaxies, as if every single person had drawn in a breath at the exact same moment.

But that was not the end.

Because Dylan, trembling at the responsibility thrust upon him, decided to reveal the finished products one by one.

The dishes were set down in front of the camera, each one gleaming like it had been kissed by the heavens.

And the Star Net descended into madness once more.

The first item on the table gleamed like a golden pillow. Dylan leaned forward, his voice trembling with sincerity.

"This... is an omelette. Look at how soft it is. How fluffy. How it trembles when I poke it." He tapped it lightly with his chopsticks. The omelette wobbled beautifully.

The live chat went berserk.

[KYAAAAA! DID YOU SEE THAT?! IT MOVED!]

[WHY DOES IT LOOK SO FRAGILE, I FEEL LIKE IT HURT WHEN HE POKED IT!]

[I SWEAR I JUST FELT THAT IN MY SOUL!]

[NO, YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND, I THINK I HEARD IT WHIMPER.]

"...Right," Dylan coughed, cheeks red. "If you watch the video carefully, you’ll see just how complicated it really is."

Complicated was an understatement, at least to the viewers. To them, rolling layers of egg in a pan was nothing short of a miracle.

[Impossible. This is rocket science.]

[How did he even... flip it like that?]

[Do we need military clearance for this technique?!]

[Someone stop him. He’s revealing forbidden arts.]

And just as everyone was ready to devote their lives to egg mastery, Dylan unveiled two more dishes. Stir-fried lettuce with garlic, glistening in oil, and cucumber salad sparkling with sauce.

He held them up side by side. "These... these surprised me the most. I never thought vegetables could taste this way. But I was told they’re healthy. So I guess it makes sense?" Because it’s not like vegetables didn’t exist. It’s just that after tasting these, how could he ever call those others edible?!

[HEALTHY?! Our vendor cares about our lives.]

[He really thinks of us as his children.]

[PROTECT HIM. PROTECT THE PRECIOUS.]

Even Dylan, swept up in their fervor, nodded like a fanatic. "Yes... yes, he really is thinking of us."

The chat howled with tears.

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