Chapter 252
Avery’s POV
He hadn’t answered my question.
His silence lingered in my mind as the taste of him faded from my lips.
If he felt it, why couldn’t he just say it? Our bond told me his feelings. Desire, yes. Concern, yes.
Wouldn’t I feel it if he loved me?
He would kiss me in front of his men, but he wouldn’t tell me what I meant to him. If I stayed here, was
that how our relationship would continue, with so much unsaid?
Or was there a possible future where we finally were transparent with each other? He had tried to offer that to me before. What if he dropped his shields and behind them there was not the depth of emotion I hoped for?
I wasn’t sure I could stand knowing that he cared somewhat for me, but not the way I cared for him. To be half-loved, a stand-in for a mate he would have loved more.
Could I ever believe that he loved me, even if he decided to say it?
My secret couldn’t afford to wait until he decided where his emotions lay. I couldn’t plan my future around a ‘maybe’.
I slid off of the kitchen stool and stepped outside into the late afternoon sunset. There was a festive air in the village, with everyone dressed in their best clothes, whether they intended to participate or not.
This afternoon the wolves were gathering in two groups. Predominantly men in one and women in the other. In the Annual Mating Ceremony, the wolves roamed in the forest until they found and captured their mates.
It was an ancient custom adapted for modern times, and certainly there were some partnerships that followed a different paradigm, but for the most part it was seen a big, flirtatious game in which the wolves played hard-to-get while their prospective partners proved their physical strength and agility.
If I entered that forest tonight, Gideon would be out there, hunting along with the rest. He had said that he would find me, but there would also be dozens of other wolves eager to be captured by their Alpha.
What if one of them drew his eye instead? 1
If I went into the woods, my wolf could also look for him. We could truly solidify our mating bond and my life would change forever. Right now we were operating on a half-formed bond through my mark, but if I accepted Gideon and marked him back, we would finally be full mates.
For a moment my resolve fluctuated. I was at a crossroads, Was I willing to accept an outcome where Gideon didn’t end up as my reciprocated mate?
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Chapter 252
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Leaving would mean giving up any claim to Gideon’s life. Being married hadn’t seemed to mean much so far, but it was something. A token level of involvement was required to maintain the fiction that we were a married couple, and it meant that Gideon was at least somewhat present in my life.
If I didn’t go to the mating ceremony, I was refusing to stake my claim on him, and other wolves would take notice. A very primal part of me that spoke with my wolf’s voice was savage at the idea of anyone else daring to try to mark our mate instead.
But my choice didn’t just effect our future. It was also that of our child. If I completed my bond with Gideon, I would never want to leave. I would be tied to him into eternity.
Still, I found my feet turning in the direction of the woods. I was drawn
there by my fear of missing out. I
was the Luna, and Gideon’s wife. I was the one who would claim, and be claimed by him.
And yet, as I turned onto the main path, there was a gaggle of thinking
chatter floated back to me.
young woman ahead of me, and their
“Have you seen his wolf form?” One was saying, “It’s huge. Do you think it lines up…?” They all giggled.
“He said he’d look for me,” sighed another, dreamily. She was one of the young women who had been
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